Who Knew...

I grew up thinking, I'll meet my prince charming, get married, and have four kids. Well I soon after learned life doesn't exactly work out the way you want it to. No matter how much of a planner you are. How could I of had such a simple view on how life is supposed to be? I'm not going to say I've had a hard life, but it hasn't been easy.
So I've met the "prince charming" which I no longer believe in prince charming, but I have met a very special guy for me. I now only want 2-3 kids. I just always assumed getting pregnant wouldn't be an issue for me. Come on my grandma always told me I have great hips for birthing! "Easy" has never worked for me. I joke with my husband that we have a "shit cloud" above us. If we want something, we have to work 10 times harder to get it, if something good happens to us, it will be followed with bad bad bad things. No matter what we do can't escape the could. Needless to say we've been struggling to getting pregnant. Started trying in April 06, got pregnant in September, miscarried in October. 10 months in, and I feel like I have to basically start all over again. When I didn't get pregnant the first 2 months, I knew it wasn't going to be "easy" I used to work with this woman who tried to conceive for 3 years with no luck, she turned so bitter. Anytime someone she knew got pregnant she'd get mad at them. That was my first thought that came to mind when I knew it wasn't going to be easy. I don't want to be bitter. I am happy to report I've known several people who have gotten pregnant, given birth, and I haven't had one bitter thought. To my friends out there, please don't allow me to ever get bitter!
I have days where the struggle gets to me. I usually keep those private. As you know one of my 2007 goals is to stay positive....I'm trying.