Full Plate

I like having a full plate. This means to me that I juggle a lot of things at one time. Looking back, I realize I've always been this way. I know it has a lot to do with my childhood. My sister and I always had to balance something. School, cooking, cleaning, younger brother, etc. Most of the time I wish I had a real childhood, but am grateful on who it made me become. I'm strong. On the downside I don't show deep emotions to others very often. It's hard for me to let my guard down. I think it goes back to me always taking care of others. It's what I love to do. I'm starting to realize one of the main reasons I love taking care of others is so I don't have to focus on myself. I'm trying to make more of an effort in this area.

For well over a year I volunteered with a homeless organization. I used to go to the shelter at night, hand out soup and sandwiches, and help clean up the kitchen. My way of giving back to something I believe in. My schedule has conflicted lately and I haven't been going. I miss it, and need to make it a priority again. I know I will have the time, if I switch up my schedule.

A part of me feels like I don't have enough on my plate right now. Most of you think I'm crazy for saying it. I currently do have a lot of major things going on. I can't explain really why I feel this way, perhaps the feeling will pass. In my head I function better when I have a lot to juggle. As I type this I realize how weird I sound. Like I said before it's hard to explain.....